Posts tagged with the keyword: ‘president’

Audio tape: Ranting Al Gore threatents to put alleged assault victim in “lockbox”

Audio tape: Ranting Al Gore threatents to put alleged assault victim in “lockbox”

In a shocking development, the Portland Police Bureau in Oregon has released a transcript of what it says is an audio tape of a ranting Al Gore threatening the woman who has alleged that he sexually assaulted her. “It starts off pretty deadpan,” said lead investigator, Paul Pearson. “You know, typical droning Al Gore stuff. [...]

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Obama nominates Lou Costello Elena Kagan to Supreme Court

Obama nominates <del>Lou Costello</del> Elena Kagan to Supreme Court

In a move signaling his continued dissatisfaction with the composition of the Supreme Court, President Obama has selected Elena Kagan as the nation’s first apparently asexual Supreme Court nominee as a replacement to retiring justice, John Paul Stevens. While many complain that the Supreme Court is far too white, or too Catholic, or too male, [...]

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A Square with Jokes – September 8, 2009

A Square with Jokes – September 8, 2009
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A Square with Jokes – June 16, 2009

A Square with Jokes – June 16, 2009
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Federal lottery announced in light of economic ‘doomsday’ predictions

Federal lottery announced in light of economic ‘doomsday’ predictions

WASHINGTON – In response to cries of economic Armageddon over his administration’s impending spend-o-thon,  President Obama announced today the unveiling of the first ever U.S.-wide, government-run lottery. The prize? Potentially trillions of dollars. The catch? The ‘winner’ receives the prize with an attached minus sign. “We think this is an opportunity for the American people, [...]

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A Square with Jokes – March 18, 2009

A Square with Jokes – March 18, 2009
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Obama hires TV’s Bob Vila to fix cabinet

Obama hires TV’s Bob Vila to fix cabinet

Obama has reached out into the cult of celebrity and tapped TV personality Bob Vila to fix his cabinets.

Obama might now find some time for more government spending. He’s really good at that.

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