A Square with Jokes – August 4, 2009

A Square with Jokes – July 29, 2009

A Square with Jokes – May 19, 2009

A Square with Jokes – April 29, 2009

Obama in catatonic stasis after questioned about ‘Earth Hour’ environmental benefits, economic threat

WASHINGTON – During this morning’s press conference, President Obama suddenly seized up, standing completely motionless when questioned by a reporter about tonight’s ‘Earth Hour’ event. The brain lock-up error, eerily familiar to daily users of Microsoft Windows products, occurred when a reporter posed the following question: “While switching off lights and other electrically-powered devices for [...]

President Obama to nationalize mattress industry

“In increasing numbers, citizens had shown their distrust of the financial markets by storing what little savings they have in their mattress, but the government cautions that taking those mattresses should not be misconstrued as a cash-grab.”

Federal lottery announced in light of economic ‘doomsday’ predictions

WASHINGTON – In response to cries of economic Armageddon over his administration’s impending spend-o-thon,  President Obama announced today the unveiling of the first ever U.S.-wide, government-run lottery. The prize? Potentially trillions of dollars. The catch? The ‘winner’ receives the prize with an attached minus sign. “We think this is an opportunity for the American people, [...]

A Square with Jokes – March 17, 2009

Toy giant to release ‘Obamanopoly’ board game

PAWTUCKET, R.I. – Yes they did. Toy and game behemoth Hasbro announced today that it will be releasing an exclusive version of its all-time family favorite board game Monopoly in light of President Obama’s recent economic efforts. The game, dubbed ‘Obamanopoly’, will feature many of the original’s longstanding elements like property spaces, board layout and [...]

Case study: recession hurts incompetent morons’ ability to find job

“He looked the part enough, and his resume was OK, but as soon as he opened his mouth, it was all downhill…If he’d had toilet paper stuck to his shoes, it wouldn’t have been any worse…”