Some high school activities groups are hoping to ride the Glee coat tails to popularity

The success of Fox Network’s hit prime time television series, Glee, is accomplishing more than simply bolstering Fox’s  Wednesday night lineup. It is also provoking widespread belief in high schools across the nation that historically ridiculed clubs might achieve “cool” status.

The series premiered in the fall of last year and centers around an Ohio high school glee club. Glee clubs are conventionally known for corny, campy renditions of popular music and show-tunes, often accompanied by cheeky smiles and cheesy dance moves (think “jazz hands”). The Hollywood version populates the fictional club, however, with a slew of hip kids (mostly portrayed by twenty-something actors) and uber-slick music productions relying heavily on auto-tuned vocal tracks.

Authentic or not, though, the show has some believing that the traditionally panned high school subgroup has become popular, at least if TV viewership is any measure. And that has led some students, perhaps unrealistically, to anticipate similar treatment of their stigmatized activity group.

“We really feel we are at a turning point,” said Raja Bhatnagar, president of the chess club at Martindale High School in Nebraska. “9 months ago, I was stuffed inside my locker when I suggested a chess match with one of our football lineman to settle a dispute over the proper ownership of my retainer. But I have a feeling that if I asked him now, I wouldn’t get more than a wedgie – and not even the atomic kind. Momentum is on our side.”

Gilbert Yablonsky, member of the school’s audio-visual club, concurs. “I wrote NBC even, telling them that the success of Glee opens the door for a new show called ‘A/V,” he said while pushing a TV cart down the school’s hallway. “Of course, I think it’d be neat if it were set 2000 years in the future. And people could cast spells.”

Yablonsky added, “There’s definitely a misconception that we are all nerds and don’t –OWWWW! Gosh darn it!!” he said, as his shoulder was brutally clipped by a passing letterman.  “Anyway,” he continued, furiously rubbing his arm, “that’s just the stereotype. Most of us are really neat people. I think the other children in the school would find us interesting, or ‘cool’ if you will, if they just gave us a chance. In fact, I’d bet my Dungeons & Dragons collection that the entire wrestling team would be instant friends if they spent 5 minutes at the lecture I deliver to freshman AV members entitled, ‘The Degradation of Video Signal Transmitted Over Fibre Optic Cables Sheathed in Aramid Yarns.’ Really fascinating stuff.”

However, Norma Munson, the high school’s guidance counselor, is concerned.

“I think these kids are getting ahead of themselves. Heck, I’m their guidance counselor and sometimes find myself encouraging them to pursue activities that are … let’s just say less likely to spark confrontation. Sounds awful, I know, but when a 16-year old boy breaks down in my office in a massive fit of tears and asthma-induced wheezing because he got de-pantsed in the cafeteria, well, let’s just say sometimes you start to consider the path of least resistance,” she said. “Head down, mouth shut, no eye contact. That’s these kids’ best hope.”

Ms. Munson might be right to caution against too much optimism. Even cast members of Glee seem to adhere to the usual opinions of members of their high school’s havens for the have-nots. For instance, when asked whether she would have ever dated a member of the Math Team in high school, Glee star, Lea Michele, who plays diva wanna-be Rachel Berry on the show, succinctly replied, “Eww.”

In the interest of full disclosure, this reporter intended to interview a member of the Martindale Bulldogs football squad, but simply couldn’t do it. Having once been managing editor of a high school newspaper and president of Quill and Scroll, bad memories prevented a face-to-face discussion with anyone resembling a certain athlete that once emptied a bottle of crazy glue in the jockstrap of certain student journalist.

However, from a second hand source, it was learned that senior linebacker, Nick Reimer said, “I watch Glee for the hot babes and the funny lesbo cheerleader coach. But glee club is still gay. Hey, why didn’t that geeky chinless dude just ask me himself? And why is he hiding behind the librarian? What a weirdo. Dude, you know I can see you, right?”