WASHINGTON – President Obama is turning to religion in his latest effort to help struggling homeowners avoid the consequences of treating their homes like limitless credit cards. Obama is asking U.S. banks to give up mortgage payments for Lent.

Lent is a 40-day-long season of sacrifice observed by some Christian denominations, most notably, Roman Catholics. During the season, observers typically give up various comforts as a sign of penitence.

However, because it also plays the foil to secular traditions such as the annual rut-fest held in New Orleans, also known as Mardi Gras, it is generally well know among other religions and even militant atheists and has entered the popular lexicon. Lent begins this week.

“Not being a Papist, I don’t observe Lent myself, but I think most of us, regardless of our religious choices, grasp the concept,” the President said in making his announcement. “As I’ve tried to underscore on many occasions, our economic recovery will depend on lots of sacrifice, and the concept of sacrifice has been pretty well baked into Lent. So, this is a perfect opportunity for our banks to get into the spirit of sacrifice, to help us fully leverage the spirit of Lent.”

President Obama and his mouthpiece show support for Lenten mortgage relief

Although for now the suggestion has been phrased as a request, the administration warned it could be swiftly upgraded to a law. “If for 40 measly days they can’t help the consumers upon whose backs they’ve been laying the bricks of their ivory towers, we’ll see they spend 40 days in the desert,”  said militant Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi during arcane, rambling remarks made at her own follow-on press conference held after Obama’s announcement.

“And I know all about Lent,” she added. Pelosi, who proudly embraces her status as a prominent Cafeteria Catholic, accepts Lent but rejects other aspects of church doctrine that are inconvenient for her.  “Lent shouldn’t just be about ashes on your forehead. It should also be about helping people stay in their homes.”

Since Lent begins tomorrow, homeowners will enjoy immediate relief, as banks will be forbidden to collect mortgage payments for the following 40 days.

Clarifying the policy, White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs said the Lent Mortgage Relief Act (LMRA), as it is called, is not simply an extended grace period. “What kind of sacrifice would it be if the banks got to recoup these payments later?” he asked. “They’d probably even expect interest. No, no. This will be a permanent reduction in the principle owed on the loan prorated according to the 40-day period that makes up Lent.”

Mosaic Manumit, president of the Deadbeats’ Executive Front Against Loan Terror (DEFALT), praised the president’s action. “This will be a lifeline to the over-extended consumer – the consumer who didn’t see this coming. Best of all, it is being extended to people of all faiths – including those who don’t observe Lent. If that’s not progressive, I’m not sure what is.”

But economists panned the plan. “This is another nail in the coffin of capitalism,” said Tackier Absinthe, who holds a doctorate in secular banking and teaches economic nihilism at Valkyrie University in Montana. “Worse still, it is also another nail in the coffin that separates Church and State.”

But according to Gibbs, LMRA is only the beginning. “We’re excited about introducing the Ramadan Mortgage Relief Act, the Advent Mortgage Relief Act and the Passover Mortgage Relief Act as well,” he said. “Of course these as well will apply to believers and infidels alike.”

Originally posted 2009-02-24 20:11:05. Republished by Blog Post Promoter