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In Tiger Woods' latest video game, these won't be the only trophies you can land.

Pornographic Arts (PA), which recently acquired the rights to the popular line of Tiger Woods computer and console games, announced new details about its plans for its relaunch of the series. The updated edition, tentatively titled “Tiger Woods PGA Tour 11: In the Buff and the Rough” and slated for release in early 2010, will for the first time include features based on the golf savant’s off-course exploits, focusing especially on his sexual conquests.

“In the past, the games featured a lot of collateral material that boosted the user’s overall enjoyment of playing video golf without distracting from the game’s core mission, which is delivering a truly lifelike golf experience,” said Vandalised Rotundity, a spokesman for PA.

“Although the focus of the game will clearly remain golf, we wanted to take this opportunity to go beyond simple accessories like unlockable drivers, irons, shirts and other trinkets. We’re introducing an entirely new and immersive dimension to gameplay, one that encompasses the entire state of mind, body and spirit of the elite [male] golfer.”

For example, as users build up their avatar status with holes-in-one, tournament wins and – most important – cash earnings – a hierarchy of increasingly valuable concubines ranging from common street whores and golf-specialist groupies to mid-level suburban tarts and cocktail waitresses to high-maintenance club hipsters and independently wealthy cougars will become attainable trophies.

Just as in real life, access to tasty trollops will be governed by a player’s fame and cash level. “If you’re just starting out on the pro circuit, sure, you’ll get some tail, but it won’t be quality,” explains Rotundity. “I mean, it will still be a helluva lot better than what the typical married plumber can get, but it won’t be elite. That only comes with a lot of time and in-game character development. It gives the player something else to work for.”

Rotundity said the intimate off-course scenes will be displayed in graphic, “sometimes photo-realistic” detail by default, but can be toned down by the user. “At the end of the day, this is supposed to be a realistic, sophisticated simulation,” he explained. “Why show high-def, beautifully rendered holes on the course but not on the gals?”

“We want this game to bring to the average Joe the sights, the sounds and hopefully, someday the smells, of everything that goes into elite tournament golf and the whoremongering privileges that come with that status,” he added.

But also mirroring real life, the awards don’t come without risks. “There’s always a chance your character could catch a social disease that could drain your ability points,” says Rotundity. “And, if your character is married – something that provides certain stability bonuses – there’s a chance his wife might find out and make a scene, which could impact his earnings and might even prompt an expensive divorce settlement, and those are deducted from your career earnings and do affect that aspect of the leaderboard.”

But he is quick to add that, also true to the real world, even the adverse consequences of the most wonton womanizing are just bumps in the road to the elite athlete.

“In the end, the objective is to have fun. A player isn’t going to lose his sponsorship or anything crazy like that. I mean, why would we simulate responsibility when it doesn’t exist in real life?”

Originally posted 2010-01-04 12:45:48. Republished by Blog Post Promoter