NNEW YORK- On the eve of the opening ceremonies, Dick Ebersol, Chairman of NBC Universal Sports, was stunned today during a press conference when a German reporter asked him if the network would be covering the Men’s Giant Slalom in the 2010 Winter Olympics in Vancouver, Canada. “The what?”, Ebersol asked, following the question of [...]
WASHINGTON – Reeling from back-to-back blizzards that dumped more than three feet of snow on the Washington, D.C. area, the Federal Government and U.S. Capitol remained shuttered for a record fourth consecutive day today. Nevertheless, life continued as normal throughout the 50 states, unnerving democrats everywhere. Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi pointed out several [...]
“There are many parallels between Port-au-Prince and New Orleans: Billions of dollars in squandered government aid money; chronic, multi-generational poverty; rampant crime and looting; unbridled government corruption; official victimhood status at the hands of the white devils; and voodoo.
“The heavens will open, sunshine will spill forth, and all the ailments of New Orleans will disappear in the healing glow of the championship! All of them! Poverty? Gone! Corruption? Gone! All those damn fru-fru sounding French names? Gone!”
NEW YORK – Orphan futures, under relentless pressure since the earthquake that devastated Haiti on Jan.23, enjoyed a dramatic turnaround today during heavy trading on the New York Mercantile Exchange. The surge, which saw spot unit prices for March delivery of orphans spike $5, or 20%, came after traders received word that sightings of aggressive [...]
Sweeps Week shocker planned: hubby to slaughter, butcher and eat wife on ‘Man Woman Wild’
Swine flu – it’s like bird flu – only new!
Obama considers resigning presidency to host show on The Travel Channel
Dennis Rodman: Conquest of 2,000 women a ‘teachable moment’ for parents
Lohan checks more items off her “Bucket List” of celebutard achievements
Pelosi alleges conspiracy by “all Americans” to thwart her poll numbers
St. Louis Cardinals to hire Brandon Phillips as motivational speaker
