WASHINGTON – White House and State Department officials declared the unrest in Iran over today, citing the abrupt discontinuation of all news coverage about the civil strife in the troubled theocratic state and crediting the untimely demise of demon-plagued pop star Michael Jackson as the catalyst.
“We’ve not received a single report of any unpleasantries since [...]
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…what caused the deer to attack? Why is the Kentucky Government covering it up? Since when does a Kentuckian not know how to fire a shotgun? In truth, as it turns out, Bobby-Lee could talk. Such a shocking development seems unbelievable at first, yet now it can be revealed that the dog either escaped or possibly was stolen from a top secret Government installation at Fort Campbell, where a nameless, ultra-secret government agency breeds literate dogs for espionage purposes.
NEW YORK – A study by the Annenberg Center for the Digital Future has concluded that the Internet is now the most effective way to avoid interaction with one’s family members. According to the survey, the Internet is poised to overtake television, which has a long and rich tradition in helping individuals avoid the drudgery [...]
Mass confusion halted play in a key soccer match yesterday due to a little-known nuance, apparently called a “goal.” During the match…a player kicked the ball as usual. However, it left the field of play and entered the protective netting at the opponents’ end of the field. Unsure how to proceed, the game awkwardly halted.
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NEW YORK – Just a week after running its first unseen footage in two years, NBC’s paranoid tour de force “To Catch a Predator” is aiming to up the ante in its bizarre corner of reality television by introducing live-action porn stars into the cast of characters the Dateline NBC offshoot uses to lure disturbed [...]
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NBC executives unaware of non-skating Olympic events
Country functions normally during four-day shutdown of Federal Government and Capitol, Dems in panic
Port-au-Prince to receive NFL franchise
Super Bowl win expected to magically cure New Orleans
Orphan futures surge on Madonna, Jolie sightings in Haiti
Earthquake Strikes Yellowstone, Frightens Woodland Critters
New Tiger Woods computer game to feature unlockable trophy women
