2009 May | wineandexcrement.com

A Square with Jokes - May 31, 2009

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May 31, 2009 | Posted in A Square With Jokes | Read More »

Source: Ronald Reagan to run posthumously in 2012 presidential bid

WASHINGTON - Forget Sarah Palin. According to an unnamed source close to the Republican Party, the next President of the United States could be…Ronald Reagan?
The surprising revelation comes on the heels of what some analysts call the final moments of the Republican party.
“They’ve trotted out Limbaugh, and now, Cheney. Moves that can only be described [...]

May 28, 2009 | Posted in Politics | Read More »

GM to relocate to North Korea, produce nuclear-powered Hummers

WASHINGTON – On the heels of North Korea’s test of a nuclear warhead and several missile launches, U.S. officials have announced a dramatic breakthrough agreement with the wayward nation that involves beleaguered auto industry has-been General Motors.
Under the agreement, Detroit-based GM, which had been facing a looming bankruptcy filing, will shut down its entire U.S. [...]

May 27, 2009 | Posted in Financial News, Science & Technology | Read More »

Sotomayor: Obama should replace entire administration with ‘Latina Women’

WASHINGTON – Although her nomination to the nation’s highest court is barely 24 hours old, Supreme Court hopeful Sonia Sotomayor is loudly and publicly demanding that the president not stop with his assist in her historic rise to the threshold of judicial all-stardom. In a tearful yet defiant press conference today, Sotomayor called on President [...]

May 26, 2009 | Posted in Politics | Read More »

A Square with Jokes - May 26, 2009

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May 26, 2009 | Posted in A Square With Jokes | Read More »

US to force citizens to choose between Vespa scooters or Segways

DETROIT – Fed up with the increasingly complicated debate about the connection between the hulking vehicles favored by Americans and global warming, the Obama administration has suddenly and summarily decided to radically impose change on the already-tumultuous domestic auto industry. Beginning in 2012, American drivers will be limited to Vespa scooters or Segways for their [...]

May 20, 2009 | Posted in National News | Read More »

A Square with Jokes - May 19, 2009

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May 19, 2009 | Posted in A Square With Jokes | Read More »

A Square with Jokes - May 17, 2009

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May 17, 2009 | Posted in A Square With Jokes | Read More »

Shuttle mission to turn Hubble Telescope into giant death ray

The Space Shuttle Atlantis launched yesterday, allegedly on a repair mission to extend the life of the Hubble Telescope. However, sources reveal that the mission actually intends radical modifications to the telescope, changing it into a powerful weapon in the fight against illegal immigration.

May 14, 2009 | Posted in Science & Technology | Read More »