DUBAI, United Arab Emirates – Looking to tap into the momentum generated by his wildly popular ban on BlackBerry devices, UAE President Khalifa bin Zayid Al-Nuhayyan today announced an expanded campaign against what he called “20th century technologies that offend the sensibilities.” “Bear in mind, this is just the start of even greater things to [...]
August 2, 2010 | Posted in
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Thousands of classified documents, including those detailing military strategy in the Afghan war, were released today by WikiLeaks.org, a self-propagandizing and unscrupulous website dedicated, ostensibly, to transparency in government. However, in a fit of what can only be called incredible stupidity, within the trove of posted documents, WikiLeaks apparently also inadvertently released the medical records [...]
WASHINGTON – Greek officials were left to anguish over what might have been today after failing to finalize a promising agreement that would have canceled one third of the country’s obligations under a proposed 750 billion-euro rescue package for the failed socialist state. The United States had been increasingly vocal with concerns about its $54 [...]
May 12, 2010 | Posted in
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MOSCOW – Russian President Dmitriy Medvedev confirmed today that he was sending seven army divisions to Kaliningrad, where they will remain on alert along the Polish border in response to last week’s crash of a Soviet-built Tupolev Tu-154 carrying Polish President Lech Kaczynski and 95 others, including high-ranking military and governmental officials. All 96 on [...]
April 14, 2010 | Posted in
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“There are many parallels between Port-au-Prince and New Orleans: Billions of dollars in squandered government aid money; chronic, multi-generational poverty; rampant crime and looting; unbridled government corruption; official victimhood status at the hands of the white devils; and voodoo.
February 8, 2010 | Posted in
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NEW YORK – Orphan futures, under relentless pressure since the earthquake that devastated Haiti on Jan.23, enjoyed a dramatic turnaround today during heavy trading on the New York Mercantile Exchange. The surge, which saw spot unit prices for March delivery of orphans spike $5, or 20%, came after traders received word that sightings of aggressive [...]
February 1, 2010 | Posted in
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WASHINGTON/OSLO – In a shocking decision announced today that revealed a sea change in the thought process of the Norwegian Nobel Committee, President Obama was crowned the 2009 winner of the award. The decision sparked an immediate flurry of criticism from observers worldwide who pointed out that President Obama has accomplished essentially nothing in the [...]
October 9, 2009 | Posted in
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What an ordeal! I have climbed highest mountains and run through the fields. I’ve even scaled city walls just trying to find what I was lookin’ for. That’s a lot harder than it sounds, friends – you try to find a walled city in this day and age. It ain’t the 1700s anymore, mate.
October 8, 2009 | Posted in
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During the ceremony, which took place in the Rose Garden at the White House, President Obama presented a signed, leather-bound book of Polish jokes to the Russian ambassador, noting, “Mr. Ambassador, I trust your government knew all along that the notion of the United States’ honoring the missile-defense deal with Poland and the Czech Republic was good for as many laughs as the jokes in this volume are.
September 17, 2009 | Posted in
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PITTSBURGH – When the Group of Twenty (G-20) met earlier this year in London, the gathering of Finance Ministers and Central Bank Governors of the world’s top 20 industrialized countries signed off on urgent action to temper the ravaging effects Great Depression 2.0 was having on the developing world. Although the crux of the plan [...]
August 18, 2009 | Posted in
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