Obama has reached out into the cult of celebrity and tapped TV personality Bob Vila to fix his cabinets. Ob...
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Author Archive
Swine flu – it’s like bird flu – only new!
“Millions sick! Hospitals overwhelmed! Churches closed! The Surgical Mask will be this year’s ‘it’ ...
October 11th, 2011| Posted in Health Read More»
Super Bowl win expected to magically cure New Orleans
“The heavens will open, sunshine will spill forth, and all the ailments of New Orleans will disappear in the...
February 2nd, 2010| Posted in National News Read More»
Earthquake Strikes Yellowstone, Frightens Woodland Critters
Fully 1/8th of our elk herd got severely frightened. It was so bad that a Grey Wolf missed as he tried to uri...
January 28th, 2010| Posted in National News Read More»
Weeklong Mountain Dew™ Shortage Culminates In Office Riot; Fourteen Maimed
A temporary shortage of Mountain Dew™ spiraled out of control, culminating today in a riot at the Intellivat...
December 15th, 2009| Posted in National News Read More»
Everyone Loves Black Friday
“Bro – it’s totally awesome. I’ll just like, take my skateboard down to the mall and like, watch, dud...
November 24th, 2009| Posted in National News Read More»
Steven Tyler quits Aerosmith – middle aged housewives horrified
...Modern Rock Radio largely dismissed the announcement as irrelevant, and is not expected to bore their liste...
November 10th, 2009| Posted in Entertainment Read More»
Nation’s children too lazy to trick or treat
"...our children are simply too goddam lazy to walk around the goddam neighborhood anymore."...
November 2nd, 2009| Posted in National News Read More»
Bono Finally Finds What He’s Looking For
What an ordeal! I have climbed highest mountains and run through the fields. I’ve even scaled city walls j...
October 8th, 2009| Posted in World News Read More»
Serena Williams admitted to mental hospital after ‘roid-fueled temper tantrum
At the request of USTA officials, Williams will undergo both steroid and gender-confirmation testing. Additio...
September 16th, 2009| Posted in Sports Read More»